Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Stand Up Comic Line of the Week: "And What's Up with that 'Classmates.com' Ad?" and Sub Topic: Why Can't I Sing Harmony?

"There's no original idea under the sun," is a saying I heard all my life. It is true. I know this because no matter what I think of, if I Google key words, someone somewhere has writen something about it, including some guy who wrote about this obscure thought I had yesterday:



What's up with this Classmates.com ad? I mean, is Classmates.com insinuating it's ironic that this girl, obviously an English major, married the school football star? I don't think it was a shotgun wedding--smart girls rock!



Sub Topic: Why Can't I Sing Harmony?

I hear you--I sit near you in church, and I recognize that you're singing harmony. Therefore, I'm pretty sure I'm not tone deaf. I am distracted from worship because your voice is so pretty. I think, "What is this mystical gift that allows her to weave that angelic sound with her voice?" I mean, I hear every different note you're singing, and I can even hear ahead of time where you're going next, but I cannot do it to save my life.

Sometimes, just for fun, I make my husband and kids try work with me. They have to hold a note for a really, really, really long time, and then I dart around with my "vocal instrument" searching to plug in my note at the magical bull's eye. Sometimes I'm wildly successful, finding the note before they run out of air. Usually they can't hold the note very long,though, because they start laughing in the middle of my search, so the pressure is on for me to find my note quickly. Let's just say I'm not wildly successful very often, unless you count making the other person laugh as plan B.

4 comments:

Big Mama said...

Let me just say that you don't want to sit next to me in church. It is safe to say that only God thinks I am making a beautiful noise, everyone else is just thinking "why does she hate this song so much that she'd butcher it like that?"

Susanne said...

Okay are you my twin? Although I've never gone so far as to make my family hold notes while I try to find my harmony. That's hilarious. Just say making them laugh was actually plan A. That way you are wildly successful everytime!

Soup said...

Josh here. With your whole english major thing up top, I've got a funny picture a webcomic I follow made a while back that I thought would be fitting (and funny).

She Blinded me with Library Science!

I hope you like it!

Linda said...

Josh, I can only get the initial picture! What should I do? It was good seeing you Sunday. I saw a lot of the pics you took. Thanks!