Thursday, May 10, 2007
Another Thought Provoking Chapter In:
After sleeping more than around the clock last night as a result of the big allergic reaction, I hope I am verbally more "put-together" today than yesterday. Thank you for your prayers and well-wishes. It meant so much to me. Please visit Lisa to read her teaching and the background scripture; then these answers will make even more sense.
1. Have you ever found yourself 'in faith' yet bewildered or demoralized?
Yes, when I first dealt with depression about 10 years ago, I was confused about what was happening to me and even wondered if I were truly a child of God. I never had trouble believing that God exists or never doubted all that I had learned about his character, but I had trouble believing that his child could think and do the things I did.
2. Do you consider yourself content? Would you describe it as Decidedly Content or Dreamily Content?
At this point in my life, I am decidedly content in most areas. I had to come to terms with myself in several areas and set my face toward what I knew was right and good for body, mind, spirit and relationships. The only time I feel dreamily content now is when I look at pictures of the kids when they were little.
3. If you are not content, are there circumstances that keep you from this feeling?
I wrote about publishing last time, and this is the one area that I feel stirred to do something--I just don't know what or if it's what God wants me to do. I am "stirred" but stuck!
4. Have you ever found yourself in a place where you looked back on a period of your Christian walk and believed a great opportunity passed you by?
I wish I had walked with the Lord more closely and sincerely in high school. I wish I had pointed others toward Christ. I was wishy-washy, but if you had asked me if I was at that time, I would've denied it. Since I've worked with our youth ministry, I've met several high schoolers who have blown me away with their dynamic walks with Christ and subsequent influence not only on peers but on teachers and adult family members, as well.
5. Do you ever believe your faith was stronger in an earlier time in your Christianity and find yourself floundering now?
No, I believe it is stronger now than ever. The one exception might be the time I was on a short term trip to Kazakhstan. There were times I was really insecure about my safety, so I relied on God for comfort and protection more while there. It's easy to feel "safe" here in the USA, but that's an illusion. Anyway, the Lord means more to me now than ever, and I feel closer to him and have a stronger faith.
6. Can you recognize that this season may be one of great preparation instead of a period of "I Was"?
Even though I'm middle aged (44) I would like to believe that!