Monday, October 15, 2007

My Abominable

So I went to the dentist, and both the hygienist and dentist vigorously averred that I take excellent care of my dentalage, but in spite of my regular brushing and flossing, I have a leeettle problem.

It's the abominable wisdom tooth.

I had two extracted about 21 years ago, right after I got married. Bad scene, man. (Gas + me = bad scene.) I won't even go there. Suffice it to say that it was so bad that the experience has been the driving force in my oral hygiene all these years.

But apparently, the physiology of my tooth is my undefeatable nemesis.

Anyway, they used this new little tool in my mouth. (By the way, why does it seem that every time I go to the dentist, there is some kind of new tool? They must have a dental slave camp where dentists are locked up and forced to work 24-7 to come up with new tools and procedures. Like that one where they puff cold air on your teeth because it helps them see plaque better.) Anyway, so they used this tool in my mouth that they hovered over each tooth, which caused the tool to emit a "beep, beep, beep," sort of like a truck backing up.

When they got to the abominable tooth, it went "BEEEEEEEP-BEEP-OHMYGOSH-WARNING, WARNING-BEEP-POSSIBLE NUCLEAR FALLOUT!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, DOCTOR, BEEEEEEP!!!"

I started laughing even while the tool was still in my mouth because immediately I got this picture of a little man with a metal detector yelling, "Thar's gold in thar!" Sort of like Yukon Cornelius finding the Bumble. So now I have to do this, I guess. I dropped my x-rays off at the oral surgeon's office today.

Question 1: Why do all dental offices have that same odor?
Question 2: Did you ever feel sorry for the Bumble when Hermey pulled out all of his teeth which forced him over a cliff? Now that's a bad trip, man.

12 comments:

Debbie said...

1.I don't know why all dentist office smell the same but they definitely do!
2.I love that show! Felt a little sorry for the Bumble at first but he seemed so much happier and nicer toothless! Yeah, okay, I'm a sucker for the redeemed Grinch too!

Susanne said...

Oh dear. Hope it goes better for you this time. My dentist refuses to use gas in his office as he's had quite a few patients react badly. If that's required he'll send them to a dental surgeon. Can they put you asleep instead?

samurai said...

Ok, I know it was not funny... but your blog reminded me of when I had all four "wisdom teeth" pulled (explains a lot doesn't it ;)

I also answered your poll - but I had to opt for "other". :D

Melanie said...

Are you sure you didn't have any gas??? ;>) The dentist slave camp is priceless. Made me a little giddy, actually.

Ann said...

I cannot STAND that puff of air thing. It's more uncomfortable for me to have my mouth all dried out than to get a shot of novacain! Bleck.

Lois E. Lane said...

This is too weird...over the weekend, I discovered a rogue wisdom tooth trying force its way into my wisdom-free mouth! I also have had two removed already, but only three or so years ago. Weird, weird, weird.

Jen and family said...

I have a confession which like you has governed "my oral hygiene all these years" Please still be my friend once you read this some people think this is gross

I havent been to the dentist since I left school

the pain killer injections they gave me back then use to make my whole face sore for HOURS and HOURS after the procedure
I think I am allergic to them

I could never imagine laughing at a dentists but good on you :)

Im praying for you Linda

Jen at http://my3boysandi.wordpress.com/

Southern Girl said...

Bless your heart! Anyone having anything dental done automatically gets my sympathy. I've always been afraid to go to the dentist. I DID have all four of my wisdom teeth cut out when I was sixteen though. It was done in a hospital and under general anesthesia...I highly recommend that method. ;)

thouartloosed said...

Linda,
You have captured the dentist ordeal. I fought hard to keep my 4 wisdom teeth in spite of constant nagging from my dentist.(the only one I'll let near my mouth). So far, so good. If she comes near me with this new tool, I'll know to 'em clamped.
Kathy

Roxanne said...

My dentist had never seen hide nor hair of my wisdom tooth--then when I was about 25 they did an around the head thingy and found that I have ONE--one and only one--and it was so far up into my jaw that it was too invasive to remove. Then four years ago, it began its slow descent. There is actually plenty of room for it to come all the way in, but it's wedged against a molar. So there is like 1 mm of it sticking out, and there it remains. I'm hoping my new dentist doesn't have the beeper.

Edith said...

I'm rolling laughing at this beeper thing! You have a way with words. Me now...I only go to a dentist if I'm in severe pain. And usually I need major stuff just to walk in.

Have a blessed day.

Vicki said...

You sure DO have a wonderful way with words. So glad I found your blog today. Will pray for you about this dental stuff....it's no fun. I had my one and only wisdom tooth removed a few years ago. Not fun, but my dentist was adorable.