Let's talk diet.
Exhibit A above = Veggies that I must eat almost exclusively since I put on four pounds in Gatlinburg (maybe I ate a bear cub in my sleep?). Inexplicably, before Gatlinburg, I purchased white pants to wear at She Speaks. White pants + 4 fluffy pounds = not good.
Exhibit B = Starbucks Mocha Mint Chip Frappuccino made with creme, which is what I bought my 15 year-old today. She let me taste it. She allowed me to taste it.
I almost couldn't drive home after that taste, swerving across lines, taking the curbs around turns, tires screeching,partially losing consciousness, people yelling at me, "Get off the road, Drunk!" And that was just from one sip. You may not like chocolate and mint, but the mint is not overpowering. It's not just delicious--it's ma-licious.
The only thing overpowering me was lack of willpower. But then I thought of the white pants, and I knew I couldn't afford it, if you know what I mean.
I think I have discovered a new diet, the White Pants Diet, which works kind of like revulsion therapy: you picture yourself all lumpy with panty lines in white pants, and then you have the strength of 10 skinny Grinches. Try it. If you're woman enough.