Monday, December 24, 2007

Cooking Has Always Puzzled Me Anyway and I Am Woman, See Me Cook

So today is our big celebrating day. My family is coming over this evening at 5 pm. And here I sit talking to you. Oh well.

This morning I was searching for a recipe for ham cooked in Coke in a crock pot. To us Northerners, that is a novel method of ham preparation. The more I read, the more I learned that ham baked in Coke (called "Coke" even if it's Pepsi or some other "pop" as we Hoosiers call it) is a long-time Southern tradition, like not wearing white after Labor Day and always having a pitcher of iced tea at the ready in case company drops in.

Anyway, I found this recipe site that cracked me up. In the middle of the recipe, there is a link that says, "If you want to turn this recipe into a puzzle, click here."

Huh? If there's one thing I don't need, it's a way to make cooking even more challenging. I thought, "What do they do? Scramble all of the ingredient amounts so that you have to figure out that it doesn't call for 12 lbs of brown sugar but 12 lbs of ham? Do they leave blanks so that you can guess how many ounces of Coke to add?" Turns out it is a word scramble. So I guess the idea is that the cook, not having much to do while preparing a holiday meal for a dozen people or more, might spend some of her spare time in the kitchen working puzzles.

While I'm filling up all that free time in the kitchen today, I might also do a little scrap booking or paint a room or change the oil in the car. Because I'll just be so bored once all 20 dishes are cooking at the same time.

All of a sudden, I'm feeling a power surge, like "I am woman; I can do it all," as in cooking, cleaning, running out for last minute purchases, working puzzles, getting the stuck green onion off of the dog's back, and looking fresh and holiday sparklish when my family arrives. Thus, I'm posting my "I am Woman" picture to convey how capable and powerful I feel at this moment.

Retro Christmas Moment, for new readers:
Here is last year's Christmas ham. We named him "Piggy Piggy Ham-Ham," and he will go down in our family's historical annals under the title, "Precious Aberrant Holiday Moments." Except for the maraschino cherry, he came out of the oven looking exactly like a pig. How's that for appetizing?


Melanie said...

Yep. You can also put Coke on a Roast. And yes, we Southerners call all of our soda "Coke." My husband picks on me about that.
Can't wait to hear how you like the ham! You will have a yummy gravy.

Susanne said...

I remember that pig, I mean, ham.

I've got so much to do, and here I sit, too. But unlike you, I am not having a "I am Woman" moment. I just want to read my book and drink coffee.

Barbara H. said...

That ham looks a little too pig-like, LOL!

Hope you have a wonderful Christmas!

Barbara H. @ Stray Thoughts

Johanna said...

That is freaking hysterical-despite many years of restaurant experience, most of my cooking endeavors involve the words "How hungry is everybody?" or "It MIGHT be good, but please don't be a hero". Sometimes I nail it, and sometimes,...well... My old friend Paul and I spent the better part of an evening talking to a calzone, I can't really describe it without the accents, but I get Piggy Piggy Ham Ham(Senor Calzoneh, was how it was pronounced, and he was beautiful, and delicious,MAN Paul can cook...Merry Christmas to you guys, or as we've been saying in our increasingly holiday ambiguous area of the country, Have A Christ-y Christ-y Christmas! You rock, lady.

Big Mama said...

Oh, that ham. I had almost forgotten.

Hope y'all have a Merry Christmas, Linda!

Missy said...

You are cracking me up. LOVE the pig.

I saw that puzzle thing earlier this week when looking for Maggie's cake recipe. What were they thinking???

I am totally digging I Am Woman's green outfit. Seriously, I would wear that now, headband and all. I also like that it almost looks like she has a little pooch.

Merry Christmas!

Llama Momma said...

Did you do this on purpose? Seriously. That's a real gift. ;-)

Linda said...

No, except for the cherry, we did nothing to encourage the emergence of the pig.