Thanks for the love yesterday concerning my monster eyes and even bigger monster doctor. I wasn't able to reply to you because I worked, cooked and attended a spring choral concert last night, but I appreciated every sympathetic guffaw and snort.
OK you zany chili aficionados, I need your creative ideas and even recipes.
Next Saturday, I'm in a chili cook-off at church to raise money for ALS (Lou Gehrig's Disease).
Of course, I have no special recipe, and of course, I cannot cook.
But that's really neither here nor there, is it?? Because I'm "in it to win it," whatever it takes.
Well, if it's neither here nor there, then it must be with you. And it might take "borrowing" your recipe for me to win. Just think of it this as a cyber neighbor (me) ringing your bell and asking to borrow an egg, just like in the good old days.
For this contest, not only do contestants have to provide chili for 10 people in a crock pot by 5:00 pm, they have to name their chili and make a display. Yes, we will be judged on presentation, but not "presentation" in the Food Network sense. In the dumb sense.
So when I turned in my registration, I had to put "To Be Announced" for the name of my chili because I couldn't think of anything.
Here are some ideas, but keep this on the DL because I don't want anyone to steal my ideas. I don't think anyone from this particular group reads my blog except for maybe Deb at Like a Rose, whose husband is probably entering.
So, if you are of that certain group and are reading this blog, please look away now (or promise not to tip off your husband) because I have ways of tracing this visit back to you and coming into your home and ripping your software out of your computer like the Secret Police used to rip film out of 35 mm cameras in Tajikistan in 1977.
Idea 1: "Hotter Than George Chili" I could put up pics of both George Clooney AND Jorge Crow because they are both hot, you know. "Jorge the Hottie" is seen here playing basketball at Oneighty Sunday night.
Idea 2: A poster of Obama saying "Yes We Can!" with my addition: "Win this Chili Cook-off!" I could tape a spoon to his hand. No recipe to go with this one, but I can get the poster. I could certainly speak to the "audacity of hope" that I will win this competition, and since I'm thinking of doing a chicken chili, I can claim there is no PORK involved in this recipe. Get it? Economic stuff? Pork?
Idea 3: "Monterey Jack Bauer Chili" which is a play, of course on "24," which I happen to know is a favorite show of the judges. Problem is, although I have a recipe featuring Mont Jack, I can't find a poster of Jack Bauer in any store. I've looked. I don't think printing one out will render a good quality pic.
Idea 4: "Hotter than the Jonas' Brothers 'Burnin' Up'" Chili. I guess the Bros have a song called "Burnin' Up," according my college daughter.
Here's a sampling of the lyrics:
I'm slippin' into the lava
And I'm tryin' keep from goin' under
Baby, who turned the temperature hotter?
'Cause I'm burnin' up, burnin' up for you baby
I'm probably the last person in this country who had never seen the Jonas Brothers, so I had to Google a video to understand "the full Jonas."
Um, not too impressive, but it might make a good chili joke.
So please share with me your recipes and ideas, ASAP. If I win, my fellow Americans, my friends, I will spread the credit all around, but most importantly, I will share all of the chili love I have to give.