Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Hair Update and I Love a Mystery!

Hair update: Got 'er done! I didn't exactly know how much sway you all would have over me, but the overwhelming enthusiasm for pic 1 cinched it for me. So she took a lot of inches and layers and told me buy some wax to texturize it. I bought that tonight, so we'll see. George is traveling, but when he gets home, I'll see if I can get a good pic. I'll post then. The thing is, it's the same length in front, but the back is way shorter. So you may not be able to tell a big difference, but I can. Anyway, I have to practice waxing my hair, which is a sentence I never thought I'd say. Thanks for all of your input!
I Love a Mystery!

So Jorge and I are driving down our street, when I notice a neighbor has his garage door up, and I see this peculiar sight.
A casket. A real casket with real hinges and hardware and everything.

In my neighbor's garage. On a foosball table.

"[sucking in air]Look!" I say. "Casket! Garage!'"

By that time we were past it, and my husband said, "What?"

"Turn around! Turn around!" I say. "Our neighbors have a casket in their garage. You have to turn around so I can see it again!"

Insert husband's eyeroll. We are big on the eyeroll in our family.

But the important part is, he turned around.

Luckily, since we were on our way to the last Oneighty of the season, I had my camera with me, and I snapped the casket picture as he creeped by. Emphasis on "creeped" because it was creepy.

And then we sped away like Starsky and Hutch, pictured at left. If we were Starsky and Hutch, I would be the blonde one because as you all know, I'm blonde and taller than my husband. I could probably heft him like this. But this picture is just so wrong. This is not the Starsky and Hutch I remember. Looks like a commercial for the E! True Hollywood Story, "Starsky and Hutch: The Duo We Apparently Never Really Knew."

Anyway, I knew you wouldn't believe me unless I took a picture of the casket, so I risked life and limb just to impress you. Because you don't run around willy nilly snapping mysterious pictures of other people's mysterious casket-filled garages--that could be dangerous.

The story almost ended there. But then this post would have been so freakishly short, wouldn't it? That wouldn't do.

So tonight, on the way home from a funeral viewing, no less, we drove by, and Jorge nonchalantly says, "Therrrre's the casket again."

"What?!" I say. "It's still there? Ohmygosh. What is going on there? I think I have to know."

Jorge looked at me askance.

"I'm serious! I have to know. I mean, this could be a Halloween decoration, or it could be a prop for one of those MADD prom wreck demonstrations that they do every spring. I have got to know. Enquiring minds want to know!"

Under his breath, he says, "Gladys Kravitz." But I don't agree. There is a vast difference between Gladys Kravitz and ...

Jessica Fletcher. However, I do have big eyes like both of them.

So I decided that when we got home, I would put the harness on Zoe, and we would "take a walk" so to speak, down the street, just enjoying the view on a beautiful spring afternoon. And if my neighbor's garage door just happened to be up, well then, I might play the sleuth "take a look-see" at the casket, so to speak.

So off we went. It's been a while since Zoe's been out due to Indiana weather, so she was off like a rabbit out of a trap. We bolted down the sidewalk in front of the casket house, and she was going all crazy and getting so near the street that I couldn't twist my neck around fast enough to get a good look. We walked a treacherous 1/30th of a mile more, then turned around because all of a sudden, Zoe was tired. She kept trying to rest in the grass, and I kept pulling and coaxing her on. All I could think of was, "Get up. Get UP! I can't solve the mystery of the casket house when you're lolling around in the grass like that! Scooby Doo would never have rolled around in a yard like that! He would've put on a costume, rung the doorbell and got inside the casket house, if not inside the casket itself!"

So right when we got to the driveway of the house, the man of the house and his teenager just happened to be bringing a large xylophone out the front door.

I bet this family has some interesting pastimes.

They had so many cars in the driveway that they were backed up to the street, so I had to cut between them (allowing me an even closer look). I wasn't going to say a thing, just look, but then ...

Zoe planted her feet and began the barking fits to beat all fits. I think she was trying to "Lassie" me a message, like "Alert! Stranger Danger! This is the bad Casket Family! Run! Run for my life!" But it was too late--Dad and son looked at us and said, mysteriously, "Hi."

What could I do?

I said, "Hi. I know I'm being a nosy neighbor, but I have to ask, what's up with the casket?"

The dad laughed. "Halloween decoration!" And then we made small talk about the xylophone and a rummage sale he was getting ready for. So if you see an ad for a sale with a slightly used casket and xylophone, that's my neighbor.

I headed home, curiosity satiated and ready to share my story, when I stopped dead in my tracks. "But still, just how did he get a REAL casket?!"

Thanks to someone blowing my cover, we may never know. On Scooby Doo, this is where they said, "And I would have gotten away with it, if it wasn't for you meddling kids!" Only I have a meddling dog who totally blew my cover and made me look more like Maxwell Smart than Jessica Fletcher. Sigh.

But I do love a mystery.


R.L.Scovens said...

This was a great mystery! Right up there with the best! I would have questioned the neighbor too. How could you not?

You know who is my favorite mystery sleuth? Columbo!!!!! That really did date me, didn't it?lol

annie's eyes said...

It's still creepy, Linda. I laughed right through all the TV references and you nailed it. Gladys Cravitz or Jessical Fletcher, you did us proud to actually TALK to the spook house curator. I'm STILL curious. Love, A

Darlene R. said...

I think that I would have done the same thing! It would have bugged me to not know what was up with that casket~~ creepy!!
I don't think I have ever seen a casket at a rummage sale.
Very interesting.

Mommy, the Human Napkin said...

Okay, I love that you went back and asked! That would have bugged me if I'd never found out. Incidentally, my husband used to work for a metal manufacturing company and guess what he did for a living? Yep, he made caskets. Our little hick county at the time had an annual "bed races" where people would put wheels on old beds and have someone sit in the bed as the "driver" and several people along the sides as "runners" to race them. My husband's company entered a casket and he was one of the "runners." I took pictures. It was awesome.

R. Kristina said...

Found you via Whittaker Woman, via Boo Mama, via Rocks in my Dryer... and here I am. Glad I found you. You are FUNNY! Thanks for the giggle. Adding you to my links.


Mocha with Linda said...

Now THIS should be filed under the I Know You Think I Make This Stuff Up category! I am ROTFL! A casket in the garage?

The person in said casket probably bolted when they probably started playing the xylophone. . . .

Oh, and be sure you don't mix up your hair wax with your leg wax! :-)

Barbara H. said...

LOL! Well, that was an adventure!

R. Kristina said...

It's me again... I forgot to give Fiddle Dee Dee credit as last stop in my path to you...

Have a great day!!!


Heth said...

Zoe as Scooby Do and Lassie. THAT cracked me up. Love your dog.

Melanie said...

You never know. They could be really like those neighbors in The Burbs and Zoe saved you!

Jennifer said...

Yeah, sure. That's what they all say. Halloween decoration. Yeah right. I love that you were bold enough to ask. I would have conspired and watched from my window for weeks until I had the whole neighborhood convinced that they were xylophoning people to death and keeping them in the casket in the garage. What a bizzarre and funny story!

Looking forward to seeing the new do!

Debbie said...

Love the Scooby Doo reference.

A Halloween decoration, really?
Pretty expensive holiday decorating if you ask me. I think there is still a mystery there-like does he work for a funeral home and got it cheap because it was a discontinued model or what?

I agree with "mocha with linda" on the I Know You Think I Make This Stuff Up category.

Queen B said...

I'm still a little suspicious....

Queen B said...

I'm still a little suspicious....

Ann said...

Great story! And I can't wait to see pictures of your haircut!

It's so cute seeing an itty bitty little dog like Zoe on a leash. What a cutie.

Fiddledeedee (It Coulda' Been Worse) said...

I don't buy it. Where was the wife? Tell me that. And....did he have a large freezer in the garage as well?

Just sayin'.

Marina said...

Linda, you really needed Scooby Doo he would of gotten to the bottom of it all! LOL!!
I don't think that man was telling you the turth,what an adventure!!
I guess we will never know.marina

Brenda said...

Ha ha! I love it! I think the halloween prop thing is just a cover, though. You should probably do some further sleuthing.

Susanne said...

You are too funny! I think I remember calling my hubby "Gladys Kravitz" one time when he was doing something. But it sure wasn't checking out a casket in the neighbor's garage. I don't think I would have had the guts to come right out and ask the casket family what was up with the casket.

Kelley said...

My grandparents had a sun room they used for storage and was off limits to us kids. One day my sister, cousin & I ventured in and found a casket. We were sure there was a body in it and were completely freaked out. Eventually we learned it was a woodshop project that a boyfriend of my Aunt's had made and given to her as a gag gift (that might explain why she didn't marry until late in life, lol).

oh amanda said...

That might be the funniest thing I've ever read! Especially the convo with Zoe aka Scooby Doo! LOL.

Miscellaneous From Missy said...

Halloween decoration my foot.
I don't buy it, not for one second!

Mary said...

Hilarious! I used to work at a funeral home so I took a casket to college class one night for a public speaking test. It was a hoot!

Can't wait to see your hair. Thanks for stopping by my place! :)

Paula (SweetPea) said...

You're a hoot, woman! First, I missed your whole vote for hair but I would've said the messy look. I LOVE that. I wish I could let go and let loose and do that but I have to 'fix' my hair so that it will for sure stay out of my face. Can't wait to see a pic. Hey, have hubby take a photo of front, side, and back? How's a 'bout that?

Do you think the man was serious about the casket being a Halloween decoration? Think he got is on discount? LOL Maybe it was going out of business or maybe the style was being discontinued? LOL

I've posted a new piece after SEVEN days!

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

Riveted. That's all I can say. Riveted to the very end.

Maureen said...

"Mystery of Casket House" I love it! I'll bet they'd have gotten away with it if it weren't for you pesky neighbors!!

I saw on a talk show yesterday that you can actually buy a casket at Costco!! Can you imagine fitting that into the car?


Susanne said...

Something just occured to me. If he was your neighbor, wouldn't you have seen that casket already outside as a decoration? Me thinks this case needs more sluething!

Susan said...

I looked at this this morning and was absolutely BLOWN away! I don't know if I'd have had the guts to ask about the casket, but I'm so glad you did!

Hey, I use wax on my hair and I've found that "not all waxes are created equal". If, for some reason you don't like one, try another. They are different.


MoodyBlue said...

This could also be solved by "Stepanie Plum"...'heroine' of Janet Evanovich series. LOL! I think that was SO creepy..Maybe there's a dead body in there? LOL! You could have also had the theme song in the background "Mission Impossible" when you were walking Zoe. Too funny. By the way, love that leash!

MoodyBlue said...

you know what else is creepy..that Starsky & Hutch picture. LOL! He is just so "holding" him wrong if ya know what I mean.

crickl said...

SUCH creepy neighbors! I totally do not believe the Halloween cover up. It's like they expected you to ask and had an answer ready!

What is WAY more creepy and disturbing is the position of Hutch's right hand. ew

Michelle said...





Hiya Linda! If you love it, so will we.

The casket story is too funny, a little creepy. Worst part is, in your pictures, it looks like a childs casket. Wooooooooooooooooooooooo hoooooooo



Jodie said...

Just for the record, my Dad is a mortician. He embalms dead people. And we NEVER had a casket on our premises. Not ever. Not even once.

But I LOVE that you harnassed up Zoe and got her all involved in your "need to know". If that dog could talk....

You're AWESOME Linda!!

sarah said...

You are WAY hilarious. I could never compete. It is all about keeping your eyes open, isn't it?

Come check out my RULES OF ENGAGEMENT: Bloggers Meeting Face to Face. I need input and I know you will have something good to say.

Have a good one!