Monday, February 09, 2009
It was a Jim/Pam-Worthy Moment
Recently in our Oneighty staff meeting, my boss, Jeff from Abilene, who occasionally lapses into speaking his native tongue, “Abilenien, Y’all,” told us that in an attempt to keep the cold outside and the warm inside his home, his wife accidentally shut their dog’s tail in their sliding glass doors.
And he just happened to also mention that the dog had an appointment with the vet for a regular check up at 2 pm that day. And he also just happened to mention that since the injury, he had a nagging fear that the vet would see the crook in Doodles’ tail and question Jeff’s “parental fitness.”
It was at this point that my mind flew out the window and hatched a sinister plot, one that was so devious I knew I could never pull it off on my own.
After the meeting, as I sat at my “Pam” desk, Jeff and Matt, another young pastor, were discussing Doodle’s near tail-ectomy. They then went to their separate offices, and I immediately emailed Matt: “Wouldn’t it be funny if when Jeff went to the vet today that they treated him as though they had received a phone call alerting them to the possibility that his dog had been abused and that Doodle may need to be removed from the home?”
There was no reply, except that Matt was back at my desk in 0.2 seconds.
“If we could pull this off, this would be classic. Do you want me to call?” he asked.
Oh, did I want him to call.
“Yes, because although I’m devious, I’m also a big chicken.”
So we discussed how he would approach whoever answered the phone, offering background info, etc. before proposing the joke.
I looked up the vet’s number for Matt, and he went into his office, closed the door and made the call.
I sat at my Pam desk grinning like an idiot.
Matt came out and said, “I don’t have high hopes for this. The receptionist didn’t seem very enthusiastic. Plus, they have a substitute doctor in today, so I’m guessing it won’t go over.”
We resigned ourselves and shared the obligatory, “At least we tried,” as if we were doing Jeff a favor instead of plotting behind his back to freak him out.
The next morning, Jeff came in and stopped as usual at my desk to discuss the day’s activities. As he started to walk away, he said, “Oh--you’ll never believe what happened at the vet’s yesterday.”
(Oh, yes I would.)
“Oh really? What happened?”
“The Humane Society almost removed Doodle from our home!”
He had a completely straight face, but I didn’t believe him for a second.
“Nuh-uhs” and “Uh-huhs” were exchanged between us until he knew that I knew, etc., etc.
So I confessed but found out that Matt had already thrown me under the bus. Because that’s what office mates do.
Anyway, Jeff said he was surprised the receptionist went along with the joke because he has tried numerous times to engage her and joke around with her and cheer her, but she’s very all-business, as in, “What can I do for you” is the only phrase she’ll utter. Sort of like an Angela Martin on “The Office.”
But, unbelievably, she did indeed come into the exam room and advise the doc to “have a look at that tail ….”
Guess she just needed a victim.
So Matt and I are pretty proud of ourselves. It was a Jim and Pam moment, minus the romance because Matt is young enough to be my son and is a pastor, so take that out of the equation, and it was a Jim and Pam moment. It was classically awesome.
It was Office-awesome.