Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Yesterday, All My Troubles Seemed So ... In My Face


Wake up to cacophony of Jorge the Jabanero ironing his clothes on the other side of the wall. "Must be beating pants on heated rocks" = first lucid thoughts.


Look outside.


Want to cry.

Get ready for work.

Straighten hair.

Same length since January.

Why can't I grow hair.

Get to work, much to do before 10:00 staff meeting.

Much to do after 10:00 staff meeting.

No time to eat lunch or snack.


Arrive home to find ants taking over kitchen.

Freak out.

Considering eating ants 1) for revenge and spite 2) to mollify hunger

Clean up ants.

Zoe watches, mesmerized.

Heat bowl of oatmeal, put pork loin roast in oven.

Walk through house to bedroom, see pile of poop on family room rug.

Clean up poop.

Zoe watches, mesmerized.

Zoe goes in cage. "Grounded."

Leave for 15 minute drive to school.

Pick up Kristin.

Unexpected sidecar occupant. Take another child home.

Drop off Kristin at our house.

Go to Wowmart. Because I hate myself.

Wowmart = lines.



It is Monday afternoon, for crying out loud.


Peruse magazines while in line. Hate Gladiator shoes. Hate the big floral print "maxi dresses" that are apparently in.

Hate lines.

Home again.

Put away groceries.

Finish dinner.

Begin cooking for a meal tomorrow night at Alpha meeting.

Check blog comments.

Miss people. Sad.

Fear that people will resent that I did not come by to check on them.

Will write apology post about not coming by to check on them.

They will forgive.

Get on elliptical at insanely late hour.

Write draft for Internet Cafe.

Write draft for newspaper article.

Check blog comments.

Miss people. Sad.

Will write apology post about not coming by to check on them.

Go to bed.

Special message to 30 x 5'ers:

How's it going? If the weekend (and Monday) threw you for a loop, don't despair, and don't give up! Tomorrow will be another day ... and so will the day after that ... And we just have to take it One Day at a Time.

BTW, have you seen Valerie Bertinelli in her bikini? What do you think? What do you think about the way she lost her weight?

Do you think we should all post pictures of ourselves in bikinis on Thursday when we do our posts?!


calista said...

Um, no to the bikini's, ski parka, maybe!

Christi said...

Sounds like a long, long day.

Well any day that walmart is neccessary is a long day.

I hate walmart.

You know, not to sound snotty - but it will, these stars have other people come cook for them, take care of their homes and kids so they can focus on working out for umpteen hours a day. I would be much more impressed with Millie Smith from Hope, Arkansas lose 50 pounds while dealing with 5 kids.

Not that I want to see Millie in a bikini anymore than I do Valerie Bertinelli.

The Davidson Den said...

Liked this one a lot. I've been there. What am I saying?! I AM there!

And about the bikinis. Sure. Why not? I'll do it. Mine will just HAPPEN to look a whole LOT like Calista Flockhart (IF I can find a pic of her in a bikini, that is).

My ADHD Me said...

30 X 5 -----really, it isn't a big deal. After just a few days I figured it out. 150 of course....Do I Win???

Dena said...

I can definitely feel your pain and wanting to cry when seeing the snow. I shed the same tears. Valerie Bertinelli - eh, she looks a'ight. I have the same bikini by the way, only I'm pretty sure mine is a size smaller.

"Just Me - NC Beth" said...

I had a wild Monday myself! Everything that could went wrong at work!!

Still hanging there on the 30 x 5...but I did curtail it to 15 today...did not go to bed until 2:00 am so I have no energy this morning!


Pamela said...

Sorry yesterday was a rough day. Your ant problem reminded me that I need to get my ant traps today (so a trip to wowmart for me) before the ants start their invasion on my kitchen. Every year it is the same story. If I get the traps out early enough, I don't have near the problem that I will have if I wait until I see the first ant.

Hope today is a smoother day.

Kim said...

Oh Lid, I'm sorry you had such a Blue Monday! And I'm sorry you had LINES, LINES, LINES at Wowmart. But let me tell you, you don't know lines until you go to another country. LOL Seriously, we never wait in line LESS THAN AN HOUR at the equivalent of Sam's Club here. My hubby hates going there so we only do it every three months or so. Or did. That store burned down (someone unhappy with the wait in line perhaps?).

Big NO on the bikinis. My body will never see the light of day in a bikini ever again. I'm debating on whether it will ever see the light of day in a full swimsuit with tankini top and boy cut bottoms. Even after losing 40 lbs.

I hope your Tuesday goes better!!!

Chatty Kelly said...

Bikini - um, NO!! Did she do the meals? Anyone with a family can't do the premade meals program. Just doesn't work. PLUS she probably had a personal trainer come to her home...again, not in my budget.

Sorry Monday was a hard day for you! We all love you. ;-) (or should I say Ken Lee?) Hang in there, today will be better.

Tabi said...

Number One-don't eat ants...might not feel so good later on.

Number Two-what did you take yesterday to make you believe that today I would post a picture of myself in a bikini???

Number Three- I hope you have a better day today!

sara said...

sounds like a typical monday! But Zoe makes me laugh everytime!

thouartloosed said...

I am not even doing this and I do not think you should post pictures of participants in bikinis.
Post participants with happy smiles that they hung in there-or maybe posed on their treadmill.
Blessings on your efforts!

Merrie said...

Great day! Today will be better!!! I've been doing my moving... and today I have officially GAINED 3 pounds! Today is better, today is better, tomorrow is even BETTER!
The ants... must be a seasonal thing. We have ants in our weekend parsonage and here. Not fun! They have GOT to go (so does this extra weight!) oh... NO horror pictures of bikini clad me... yes, you are so welcome!

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Just so we're clear about this ... that little question about the bikini? Not serious. Just smiling at the thought of blogger moms everywhere trying to get just the right pic of themselves in bikinis for their blogs. We'd be so distracted we'd miss WW III.

Liz said...

I'm sorry, Linda. Are you missing me? I'm still reading every day, whether you see me or not.

I enjoyed your Monday play-by-play account. My favorite parts were when Zoe watched, mesmerized. Too funny!

Hope you have a better Tuesday. We have flurries right now. Do you?

Heather of the EO said...

You poor thing. Hang in there!

Ants and poop in one day...that should be against the law or something.

annie's eyes said...

Glad you're kidding about the bikini, because, well, I might be too busy doing the eliptical.(I might be kidding, too) It was a big Monday yesterday here. But woohoo, it's Tuesday now. The dog has to go to the vet and the cable tv person will be here any minute. Things are looking up. Love you, Annette

Mocha with Linda said...

When my girl was about 3 or 4, she was in the tub and wanted to get her hair wet "so it will grow." She figured you had to water it like grass! So maybe you aren't getting yours wet often enough! LOL

And just why didn't Zoe take care of those ants? What kind of guard dog is she, anyway?!

Melanie @ This Ain't New York said...

Just a thought-
When your site loads, only the survey is above the fold. Maybe people are checking in and not seeing that you have a new post below.

lmerie said...

Ok - first - don't forget to let Zoe out of being "grounded" hehe

Second - ants stink, but here they are not just ants - they are fire ants which means you would not want to eat them, because they would bite YOU in the process. Ant invasions are bad though, no matter what.

Third - your term for walmart is so much better than mine!! Should never go to *&^^mart on a blue monday. No matter what - don't go!

Hope today is fabulous and may you ooze over with comments!

Susanne said...

Bwhahahahahaha. Are you trying to crash the whole world wide web or somethin'?

How did you know the weekend and yesterday did me in? Do you have some kind of new fangled spying equipment? Sigh.

Blissful Babe said...

It seems like yesterday was just a crappy day all around the blogosphere!

I love the way you posted about it, though. Made me snort. :D

I have been so horrible about my 30 x 5. I'm going to have to do something about it.

Like... I dunno...eat cake.

Susan D said...

Glad the bikini photo is a big fat NO! Besides, in all the packing and moving, I don't think I could locate mine. I know you're all so very disappointed. (yeah....right!) I'm missing my visitors too. Maybe they moved when I did. lol Blessings, SusanD

lmerie said...

Oh, another thought

So, how many comments = warm fuzzies?

We can come back through again - hehe

Karen said...

I'm impressed that you got on the elliptical after a day like this. Good for you! I hate lines, too.

Lois Lane II said...

The Zoe part made me laugh!! BTW, I felt I got my 30 mins in yesterday because I was so tensed up at the dentist's!! Seriously, when he'd pull away from me, I could feel my body sink on the chair. RIDICULOUS, lol! (But I still count as exercise, cause I was moving some muscles, LOL!).

Laurie Ann said...

You grounded your dog?! Bless her heart! Yeah, mine is spoiled rotten, LOL. Sorry about the ants and Wowmart. YIKES! The lines...40 lanes and about 6 open in ours. You're my hero of the day for going through all that and still exercising. I don't know how Valerie Bertinelli lost weight, didn't realize she was overweight, LOL. Must investigate but hope I don't run across the bikini picture becaue it would squash my self-esteem (not). Seriously, I need to check this out and see what she did. Sounds ominous. No bikini pics, ~snort! That would be too funny.

fransmomma said...

bummer of a day, huh? but it made all of us laugh and thats the important thing, right? :)
i think valerie looks great. i sure wouldnt complain if i looked like that in my bikini (which i dont), and shes got about 15 years on me!

Tammy said...

Oh my word...and i thought our crazy cold weather is bad. But snow might just send me over the edge!!

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

I think Valerie Bertinelli looks AMAZING in that bikini. I think her journey is inspirational.

Just the thought of us all posing in bikinis makes me laugh my butt off!

I've enjoyed the process, even though I've been bad at blogging about it and visiting others. *insert slap on my wrist* :)

Jules from "The Roost" said...

OK this post really made me laugh! =)

Lori said...

Ha! Love the post and the blog :) You have such a nice name for Wal-Mart, going to keep it PG and not mention what I call it.

elizabeth said...

I bought the issue with Valerie (we're on a first name basis...ahem) on it as soon as I saw it. We are the same age and I am so very proud of her. Even if she did have lots of advantages she still had to do the actual work herself.

Bikini though? I love you man, but I won't do that for you. ;)

Latte With Me said...

Oh Lidna,how you crack me up!

I think Valerie looks really good and I was glad she still looked like a real person! I always loved Valerie.

(Ha ha I just read Elizabeth's comment - obviously Valerie & I are also on a first name basis, though she knows me not!)

Debbie @Like a Rose said...

First, I love this post!

Second, I'm sorry you had a bad Monday and that I didn't even get to catch you to say Hi on Sunday.

Third, Before eating ants you better check the calorie count on them...

Fourth, BIKINIS, are you delusional?!? Not in this lifetime, not even if I lost 10 X what I've lost on your Challenge so far (three lbs., woohooo).

Renna said...

Post pictures of ourselves in bikinis.. for all of blogland to see....roooiiigght. The idea is to want people to come back to my blog, not send them running for the hills!

I have a better idea! How's bout we post pictures of our DOGS wearing bikinis?

Shawna said...

Um, that would be a big "fat" no to the bikini-posting question.

I'm sorry you had a rough day.

Speaking of looking at magazines, I was engaged in said activity at Walgreens the other day while waiting for my photos to be printed. Now I know Cosmo is trashy, but I was shocked at one of the article titles on the cover. It was something like this: "GET BUTT NAKED, 6 Things to Do Bare-A**ed." I'm sorry, but that's crossing a line for me. And there was a nudey pic on the front of Maxim. I mean, geez! Kids go in that store. Not cool, in my (old) humble opinion.

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

I like the maxi dresses, it's just on midgets like me they would look ridiculous. Which is a shame because, they all seem to be very loving re: hiding muffin tops.

Ok, I just learned this. To kill ants, you can spray vinegar on them. I haven't tried it yet, but I think that is awesome for when they are in the kitchen and you don't really want to poison your kitchen counters by Raiding them to kingdom come.