Monday, August 24, 2009

It Might Be Black Lung

How was your weekend?

Mine?

Well, you know you've read too much of your Austen-esque novel when the first phrase that comes to mind in answering that question is "I was taken ill."

Yes, there is something physically wrong with me, but I haven't settled on my diagnosis yet.

Symptoms:

Summer cold turned sinus infection. Big, bad headache and lovely drainage.
Dull, aching pain in chest and left arm and hand.
Dry, wimpy cough (like Derek Zoolander: "I think I'm getting the Black Lung, Pop.")
Bored to death.

Taking all of these symptoms into consideration, I believe I could have one of three maladies:

GERD (Gastro Esophageal Reflux Disease) although the word sounds like a combination of gout and cottage cheese (curds): "Cottage Cheese Toe."
walking pneumonia
three day-long heart attack

Only time will tell, I guess.

In spite of my affliction, I went to Kristin's first-ever cross country meet Saturday morning. She was nervous (so was I) before she started, but it all ended quite successfully according to her: "I didn't come in last!"


Here is her mother with Black Lung at the meet having her picture surreptitiously taken by Jorge and Katie. Now what kid wouldn't be encouraged by this display of enthusiasm? Black Lung, black hat, black shirt. Let the good times roll. Go, team.



After the meet, I came home and died. I fell asleep all afternoon and early evening.

Sunday morning: no church, just a day spent in bed reading the novel and watching snippets of movies like "The Firm," "War of the Worlds" and "Dances With Wolves," which is so long that think I faded in and out of sleep several times and "Mystic River," which I was afraid to watch full-out due to violence and heartbreak, so I only sort of watched it from behind my book because I am an emotional weenie.

BTW, why does the volume of commercials always come on way louder than the feature? It got so tedious adjusting the remote and removing/replacing my glasses every time I switched from TV to book to commercial to book back to TV. Very strenuous when you have the Black Lung.

Then, because the show must go on, I had to go to 180.Remix to make sure the new registration system worked correctly (like I would know what to do if it didn't). So I took my black lungs to Oneighty and tried not to infect a whole group of kids and volunteers.

Then I came home and collapsed again, here in this chair to tell you every single exciting detail of the weekend, including lovely drainage.

Now I will leave you with a cliff-hanger: Will She Go to the Doctor or Not?

But back to the first sentence of this post--How was your weekend?

26 comments:

Darla said...

doing all the back to school stuff, i'm tired! i loved when you said GERD was a 3 day heartattack, that is exactly what it feels like! hope you feel better soon.

Pamela said...

I also despise it when the commercials are louder than the show. I also have a thing about local commercials. They are the worst about the loud thing. And to top it off, I don't always have control of the remote. Somehow I am more sensitive to the change in volumn than Wes. All it usually takes is one look and he knows it better go down!

Sorry you aren't feeling well. Praying whatever it is, it will soon leave your body. Have a wonderful day.

Pam

Ballerina Girl said...

Feel better Ms. Black Lung!
My weekend was fine, a little sad with my family leaving, but on to more days!

BG

Mocha with Linda said...

Aww, so sorry you feel cruddy. But you make even that fun to read!

Get better quickly!

Joyce said...

eww...sounds awful...and it definitely doesn't sound like something you should have in the summertime....I say yes to the dr. since you've had it a while....hope you're feeling better soon.

oh, and I hate the volume on commercials too...just had to add my .02 there.

Kelly Combs said...

Go to the dr to rule out the 3 day heart attack please. Please. :-)

The commercial thing seriously drives me INSANE.

I love your descriptive phrasing. You seriously crack me up, even with drainage. :-)

Kelly Combs said...

p.s. hope you feel better. When I said "go to the dr." that was my way of saying that.

What can I say...I'm not all mushy-gushy.

samurai said...

My weekend was not long enough... i spent Saturday driving and catching up with family. Sunday was a family day.

Thank you for asking, and thank you for sharing yours with us. 8)

2Thinks said...

I hope you'll feel better soon and very soon. Go to the doctor if you have a fever for more than three days. (duh) Just wanting to help. I'd send soup over if I knew your address.

Question. Do you miss your three column?

My weekend was fabulous- lots of good news around here.

Melanie @ This Ain't New York said...

Sounds like pneumonia or "new mornin" as my great aunt would say. You need some meds, friend.

Mama Belle said...

Well, your hair does look fabulous under all that "black lung" attire. My hair would never look that good.

Robin @ Be Still and Know said...

we had a good worship svc in our new facility...posted a pic of three of us remembering our sweet Erin as she is struggling with no white blood cells at the moment, which is good, but bad...mouth sores, raw from top to bottom, but her counts are going up...so praise God!
maybe her suffering will be over soon...anyway, i had a pin on with her picture so we remembered to keep her in our praise and prayers.

Sorry you've got the ickies...make sure you have no fever...you don't want h1n1 without a tamiflu shot...

My dd has been sick with the nose ickies, too...i'm drinking echenacia tea...that extra zinc helps :)
wanting you to feel better soon

The Bug said...

My weekend was fine - I didn't do anything except read blogs & get groceries. Oh, & sleep a lot. My shoulder is feeling a LOT better, but I used it as an excuse to not do anything (like I need an excuse!).

I'm a movie weenie too - I'll physically leave the room & then ask my husband if it's safe to come back in. Maybe that's why I don't watch movies by myself LOL.

Go to the doctor!!!

Linda said...

Sorry you aren't feeling well....I guess that's an understatement if you have black lung. I'm hoping that if you don't feel better by this afternoon, you drag yourself to the doc. ; )

Had book club Saturday morning, then some friends from Illinois came to visit Saturday night. Fun was had by all.

You're a dedicated Mom to go to the cross country meet feeling the way you do. Take care.

Susanne said...

I predict you will go to the doctor or else your friend from Southern Alberta will reach across the virtual miles and drag you there herself.

Go Kristin! Looks like it was a tad chilly that day.

I hate the remote volume game too.

Now get thee to a doctor, woman, before I have to make good on the above threat!

Robin @ Be Still and Know said...

Skoots has been impersonating me again (actually using my laptop as we enjoyed an ice coffee after a work out and a dip in the pool to comment on your blog) Anyway my DD is not sick, my hubby is out of town so Saturday the DD and I went to a dollar movie and then out to our fav restaurant for dinner. After church I came home and totally vegged yesterday all day long!

I hope you fee better soon!

Blessings
Robin

Chel's Leaving a Legacy said...

Only you could make the black lung sound so funny. :-)

I loved your opening remark about "I was taken ill." I just watched "Emma" today, so that 18th century English-woman voice in my head kicked right in with you.

Hope you feel better soon!

Kaye Butler said...

We had a JR. HIGH SWIM PARTY.

Yes, I've lost a few marbles.

Your illness could be worse, I dreamed this weekend that I was at work (i work at a funeral home) caught myself on fire AND I had abdominal brain bleeds...

wow

wonder how you get abdominal brain bleeds?

Mystic River is an emotional movie and isn't violent if I remember correctly?

Kaye Butler said...

oops forgot...commericals are really loud and so are the fire and brimstone tv preachers, and infomercials....

sara said...

a quick Xray would solve the mystery!!! go to the doctor!!!

and yea for your girl for completely her first cross country meet...not last!!!

Debbie said...

My weekend was bitter sweet as we took the youngest progeny to college for the first time and then sent the middle daughter off for a semester of study in....Uganda. Yikes!

Perhaps to cure your black lung you need an Orange Mocha Frappachinno!(I have no idea if I spelled that correctly).

Lelia Chealey said...

We did the same thing this weekend! Except I had to get out of bed at 10:30pm and go to work from 11pm to 7am. I was dying. If my clients were dying, I have no idea because I was. I do home health care at night so I was pretended to care more about their needs then mine. Oh well, I think I faked them out. ;) Tonight I get to stay home and sleep my night away though. Hope you feel better sooner than later!

"Rachel" said...

I hope you get feeling better soon!

Sandy@JesusandDark Choc said...

Hope you are recovering from Black Lung, that can be nasty this time of year! :)
My daughter is also running cross country this year. Love the pic of your daughter running!
Do hope you are feeling better soon. All wise moms know families don't function well when mom is sick!

Mrs. E said...

Even when you've taken ill-- you're funny! (Sorry. Not laughing at your illness, just your description of your black lung. Have you been mining coal lately??)
Get better, but don't lose the sense of humor. I count on you for my smiles!

annie's eyes said...

So sorry you're feeling bad. What about allergies? Could it all be allergy related, dare I say? You do really well putting sentences together coherently when you are sick. Feel better, friend.