Tuesday, August 19, 2008
The Ups and Downs of it All
If only I had a "wing span" of 6ft and swam all day long, I could consume 12,000 calories a day and look like Michael Phelps, only slightly cuter. Alas, I am a stubby blogger. "Blawg," even sounds like a fat bullfrog burp.
You'll remember that I scoffed a bit at the diet garnering all sorts of attention of late, "The Alternate Day Diet," discovered/created by Dr. James B. Johnson.
Subsequently, Dr. Johnson emailed me and offered to send me his book so that I could study up on the science behind the idea and give the diet a fair shake, no pun intended (because shakes do have their place in this diet.)
First of all, here are the diet basics:
*There is quite a bit of scientific data suggesting that calorie restriction = longer life and fewer inflammatory diseases. Allergies and psoriasis are inflammatory diseases, so maybe this will help. Hot flashes should be considered an inflammatory disease, but they're not.
*People can't sustain caloric reductions very long because willpower, schmillpower. However, they do seem to be able to go on a "diet" for one day. I would agree that 24 hours is the average dieter's limit for telling herself "no." If said dieter is PMS-ing, I'd give it 3 hours.
*The SIRT1 Gene is the new skinny jean.
*Stay hydrated and move around. Be the dolphin. ?
*Especially on the beginning, make use of shakes and meal replacement bars on down days. Accuracy is important.
*Down day: Consume 500 calories.
*Up day: No restrictions, but keep in mind nutrient-rich food over non-nutrient rich food. (Broccoli vs. Indiana State Fair deep fried Twinkie.) ("Sophie's Choice" vs. "Mama Mia!") Also keep in mind that thing about not being Michael Phelps.
* Journal your intake (Weight Watchers agrees, and they are right. You hate it? Do it anyway.)
* Use measuring cups. Boy, was this ever revelatory to me when I first started using measuring devices. Yikes. My cereal bowls were fit for Jethro Bodine.
So I took Dr. Johnson up on his kind offer, and last week, my book arrived. I read it over a period of three nights, and last Saturday I had my first true day on the diet.
On Saturday, I ate: one frozen diet-type meal for 280 calories, Alex! Then I ate a fat-free yogurt for 100. Then I inhaled a Granny Smith apple, which I fear put me over the limit because it was large.
And then I had a decaf coffee with cream, which made me nice again because I had gotten very hungry and very not nice, and cream in one's tummy makes one purr and take her claws out of the curtains.
Sunday, my first "Up" day, I went out to eat with my parents and brother and sister-in-law and kids, and I had FRIED CHICKEN WITH GRAVY ON IT. And then a side of MASHED POTATOES WITH GRAVY ON IT.
The only pool I swim in is the gravy pool.
Then that night, I ate ice cream. With chocolate and nuts. You know, just a snack.
In the book, Dr. Johnson claims that many people stop craving vats of gravy and ice cream as they progress on the diet. If this proves to be true, I will name my first grand baby, "Dr. James B. Michael Phelps Johnson" in honor of this miracle.
If you are seriously interested in this book, I'd like for you to have it. And as Dr. Johnson has paid it forward to me, so I shall unto you, if you leave a comment and I happen to draw your name in a couple of days. Just say in your comment, "Lid, gravy looks good on you. Now send me that book." Or something like that. If you want to comment but don't want the book, just say, "Lid, I don't need no stinkin' book, but I Ken Lee you." Or something like that.
And who knows, if you like the diet, we can share our "Ups" and "Downs!"