I Think I Know Why Mick Can't Get No Satisfaction

'Cause he has never eaten my version of Banana Split Dessert, that's why.

First of all, it helps when you are assembling this to have the radio tuned to the oldies because it just feels right. Banana splits are so retro.

It also helps if The Stones are singing "Satisfaction" because you feel very witty when you come up with the idea that they couldn't get no satisfaction because they never had this honkin' good dessert.

And then you hold up a mixer beater like a microphone, sing a few words, then get distracted by the cream cheese and sugar clinging to the beater and lick it off.

Ta-da: Satisfaction.

OK, I put you off long enough. The recipe:

Mix 1 + 3/4 c. graham cracker crumbs, 1/3 c. sugar, 1/2 c. melted margarine. Press into the bottom of a 9 x 13". Freeze crust for 10 minutes.

Soften 2 8oz. pkgs. of cream cheese. Beat cream cheese and 3/4 c. sugar with a mixer. Spread over crust. (Just showing crust and partial frosting here. Frost the whole crust.)



Top with 20oz. drained crushed pineapple.

Slice two bananas and place over pineapple.



Add any toppings you'd like. This is where you personalize-I chose to add: chocolate chunks (not chips), maraschino cherries, strawberry preserves (wanted hunks of strawberry). You could also drizzle chocolate or butterscotch syrup or add coconut--whatever you might like on a banana split.



Pour 2 c. milk into a mixing bowl, add 2 small boxes of instant vanilla pudding. Beat until well blended. Fold in 1 c. of Cool Whip. Spread over top of other ingredients.

Refrigerate at least 5 hours; right before serving, add nut topping, if desired.



Long time readers of 2nd Cup: I am judiciously, prudently adding this dessert to the label "Ken Lee" because it is deserving. Wow. You know this is big.

New readers: Ken Lee means this.

In honor of the latest inductee to the Ken Lee Hall of Fame:

Skoots! "Say it Forward" Inaugural Post

I appreciate reader comments, and so do you. Don't even try to tell me you don't give a whit one way or the other about whether or not you receive comments because, in the words of the great 70s group Kansas, without comments, our blogs are "Dust in the Wind, All We are is Dust in the Wind." I had to wipe away a single tear just then.

Comments show us that at least one person is not only out there reading us but may also be resonating with something important we've just proclaimed to the world, like, "I Ken Lee International Delights White Chocolate-Coconut Coffee Creamer." I mean, a revelation like that, wow, it begs to be published on the Internet.

Similarly, a stunning confession such as, "I always mis-type my name 'Lidna' for 'Linda'" often evokes other powerful confessions from readers like, "When I was in my 20s, my mom told me I look like Ted Koppel," which, by the way, is probably my all-time favorite comment because it sent me into paroxysms of laughter then and still has the power to do so today, and no, I cannot quite explain why. (You're dying to know who said that, aren't you?) All this to say: Blogging Community = "You are not alone in your brain. We live there, too!" Scary, and yet, comforting.

Amazingly, no matter the drivel I toss out on a daily basis, someone says, "Me, too!" and then from my end, anyway, it's a veritable cyber love-fest between that commenter and me, in a purely platonic way, of course. Unless Matthew Fox happens to comment, "Me, too, Lid," and then it clearly crosses the platonic line, a place where I'm not willing to go with you, Matty, even though you plead in a cold sweat, "Lid, we have to go back;" I'm sorry, Matheo, but you'll have to find another soul mate today, Dr. Commenter.

Anyway.

At 5 Minutes for Moms, there's a new Friday carnival in which I'd like to participate called, "Say it Forward," which is a way to thank people who are regular commenters to your site. Please click on the button to read the details.

So on this maiden voyage today, I want to encourage you to visit "Skoots1Mom," at "My Hands, His Glory," one of my most faithful commenters and participants in any hair-brained schemes I have going on here at 2nd Cup.

About herself, Skoots says:

Blogging has helped me fight the doldrums of "mid-life" issues because bloggers make me laugh at them, their attitudes, and myself. They give me those "smiley" 'mones when I don't have any of my own.

I am a 10-year colon cancer survivor as of July 2 this year. I love participating in ACS's Relay Walk each year. My Daddy wasn't as blessed to have the same early information about colon cancer, but because of his diagnosis, I was informed I might need to get tested very early, which saved my life. Now, I'm a huge believer in early detection, knowing your family history and charging ahead instead of fearing diagnosis. Each year brings better diagnoses, better treatments and longer life.

As a youth counselor, I'm challenged to listen as teens share where they are, and I am able to share the gospel with them so that they understand the Bible as a lifelong user's manual instead of a "book of stories." Seeing the Holy Spirit in them as they grow is one of the highest blessings of my life.

A friend shared this with me recently: "If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, the fulfillment of your fall." If you'd like the see the narrative that goes with this quote, please go to
The Pear Tree.

Some Skoots factoids:

Interests

* Singing
* Playing keyboard
* trumpet; American Sign Language
* Charcoal sketching
* Gregg Shorthand--in my blood
* Photography
* crocheting
* youth counseling

Favorite Music

* Contemporary Christian
* Chicago
* Neil Diamond (and we are still friends.)
* Carol King
* Michael Buble
* Bozz Scaggs
* The Less
* Switchfoot

And this is her response to my previous post, which is WHY I LOVE HER!
LOVE YOU, SKOOTS! Menopausal Minds Unite! Please bless Skoots by hopping on over and saying, "Hi!"

Contest With a Prize: I Challenge You to a "Mug-Off!"

OHMYGOSH look at this bee-utiful button! A gorgeous "mug" on a gorgeous mug!

Seriously -- is that not the ugliest coffee mug you've ever seen?

What? You think you've got one that's uglier?

Uglier than ... THIS?:


Oh dear, I can't believe I'm admitting this, but this is an actual mug in my actual cabinet. Due to the hard water mineral deposits and the practice painting for my Christmas goblets, I have decided this mug is no longer usable by humans. Or maybe even nonhumans. It is going in the trash. Except I think something this ugly might have the strength to come back from the trash. Or the dead.

Do you, too, have tan ugly mug--really ugly-- that you need to burn or blow up but are afraid to?

Then I challenge you: Break its evil power! Show it off to the world in an "Ugly Mug-off" to be chosen by the mass public (well, anyway, people who read your blog and mine) on Monday, January 26th, 2009.

The Prize: Starbucks Card! Yes, fifteen dollars at Starbucks goes to the person with the ugliest mug chosen by votes left in my comments section on January 26th.

How to do play:

Beginning now or any time between now and the 26th,

1. Put the beautiful pirate button above on your sidebar. (Required) Here is the code:

<center><a href="http://2nd-cup-of-coffee.blogspot.com/2009/01/contest-with-prize-i-challenge-you-to.html"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5235990291736284738" style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj6J4eZ_VvcEmXODAUQDI8XnjZ_iKx2_BpkXHtpd_G94VBx3Ic5Vk-ai4Wi16D7cAVhKWm7ZYlKY5zz1XmzlHSWYsu3-gUT2gLV0wd4BgkU9d9ql-VZ6Hae_TBn9I_uv2JSnGucqw/s320/pirate+button+2.jpg" border="0" width=200 /></a></center>

2. Choose whichever way(s) you think will garner you the most votes:

A. Post a pic of yourself with the ugly mug in your sidebar under the button.
B. Write a post including the pic of yourself with the mug and directions on how to go to my site to vote on the 26th.

Personally, if I were a contestant, I would post the required button, then I would add my pic under it so that people could already see my mug and me. Then on the day before or day of the contest (Jan 26th) I'd write a post including that pic again and beg people to go vote for me at 2nd Cup. You could even do a video imploring people to take pity upon you, if you'd like. In your post, tell us the history of how you became the owner of that mug, etc. Connect with us emotionally. Draw us in. Grip us with drama and conflict and repulsion and compassion.

See? It's easy.

Rules:
You must indeed own said mug and will prove this by posting a picture of yourself with said mug.
Must be a coffee mug, not a tall travel thingy or cup. M-U-G. Look it up on Wikipedia.
You must Ken Lee coffee. Please don't enter and say, "But I don't like coffee" because you're entering a coffee mug contest with a Starbucks prize, Hello. And if you won, then coffee lovers would have to come looking for you to make you walk the plank.
No early voting.
No absentee ballots.
No hanging Chads.
Winner announced on the 27th.
One vote per person allowed.
You may not vote for yourself because, duh.

So let's see your ugly mug!

Wordful Wednesday, Because I Can't Be Wordless About These Two Things. Or Anything, Really.

*EDIT: Hair snipping is not as dramatic as stopping his vasectomy the first time, which I did.

Thing 1: "Labor Day Ham."








Look into that pan, people. If you are new here, I refer you to this post or encourage you to search "ham" on this blog. Then you will understand my desperate saga called, "Ham Wars."

And yes, that is a candy thermometer. Don't ask. I'm like Charlie Brown, and the ham is the nemesis football, which is kind of ironic, since footballs are often called "pigskins."

I just want to know what is so freaky-deaky hard about throwing a 10 lb ham into a pan, adding a little water and baking at 325* for 18 minutes per pound?

Should it come out looking like I put it in a kiln? "Good grief!"

Thing 2: Progress Report on my Kitchen

Back on July 30, I posted about being bullied by home-decor TV shows into tearing down my "ghastly" floral border in my kitchen and starting a whole new re-do. I asked for advice on which paper I should use on my accent wall and posted samples for readers to see. As a result, I received, I'm pretty sure, the highest number of comments I've ever received on a regular post in three years of blogging.

You all really care about me. Or about wallpaper. In fact, apparently, you Ken Lee wallpaper.

You will be happy to know that one full month and a couple of days later, I have that wallpaper up! Woot! And I have some color on my walls. And can I just tell you that for my traditional, neutral self, I went WILD.As soon as I get things up on the wall and cabinets re-painted, I'll post.

Thing 2, part B: I am also happy to report that in spite of wallpapering together, and by the grace of God, Jorge and I are still married! Woot!

They say if your marriage can withstand wallpapering or building a new home together, you're good for a lifetime. I think it says a lot that wallpapering is the only single task listed up there with building a building together. I think that speaks to the intensity of the task and the probability of something going terribly wrong.

And it did. Sort of.

I could've sworn I got that first sheet up on the level line.

And I did. Sort of.

You can imagine the low rumble of frustration Jorge felt when he came in to help and our pattern was climbing up the wall.

But we got that all straightened out.

And then at one point, at the end of the long day when we were so beat and our patience was wearing so very thin, I was sitting at the kitchen table doing something with the wallpaper, and Jorge was standing nearby and talking to me about some minuscule thing, and I don't know what possessed him, but he reached out like it was nothing, as if he were brushing a feather off my hair, and SNIPPED MY HAIR WITH SCISSORS.

SNIPPED. MY. HAIR.

MY. HAIR!

Can you say, "Unleash the beast!"?

Well, time has passed since then, and he is still walking around, all coherent and everything, so I did no permanent damage.

And the wallpaper is up. I can't wait to show you!

Has your spouse ever done a spur-of-the-moment, totally INSANE thing?

The Ups and Downs of it All

Come back tomorrow for a special announcement. But you might as well keep reading today since you're already here and everything.

If only I had a "wing span" of 6ft and swam all day long, I could consume 12,000 calories a day and look like Michael Phelps, only slightly cuter. Alas, I am a stubby blogger. "Blawg," even sounds like a fat bullfrog burp.

You'll remember that I scoffed a bit at the diet garnering all sorts of attention of late, "The Alternate Day Diet," discovered/created by Dr. James B. Johnson.

Subsequently, Dr. Johnson emailed me and offered to send me his book so that I could study up on the science behind the idea and give the diet a fair shake, no pun intended (because shakes do have their place in this diet.)

First of all, here are the diet basics:

*There is quite a bit of scientific data suggesting that calorie restriction = longer life and fewer inflammatory diseases. Allergies and psoriasis are inflammatory diseases, so maybe this will help. Hot flashes should be considered an inflammatory disease, but they're not.

*People can't sustain caloric reductions very long because willpower, schmillpower. However, they do seem to be able to go on a "diet" for one day. I would agree that 24 hours is the average dieter's limit for telling herself "no." If said dieter is PMS-ing, I'd give it 3 hours.

*The SIRT1 Gene is the new skinny jean.

*Stay hydrated and move around. Be the dolphin. ?

*Especially on the beginning, make use of shakes and meal replacement bars on down days. Accuracy is important.

*Down day: Consume 500 calories.

*Up day: No restrictions, but keep in mind nutrient-rich food over non-nutrient rich food. (Broccoli vs. Indiana State Fair deep fried Twinkie.) ("Sophie's Choice" vs. "Mama Mia!") Also keep in mind that thing about not being Michael Phelps.

* Journal your intake (Weight Watchers agrees, and they are right. You hate it? Do it anyway.)

* Use measuring cups. Boy, was this ever revelatory to me when I first started using measuring devices. Yikes. My cereal bowls were fit for Jethro Bodine.

So I took Dr. Johnson up on his kind offer, and last week, my book arrived. I read it over a period of three nights, and last Saturday I had my first true day on the diet.

On Saturday, I ate: one frozen diet-type meal for 280 calories, Alex! Then I ate a fat-free yogurt for 100. Then I inhaled a Granny Smith apple, which I fear put me over the limit because it was large.

And then I had a decaf coffee with cream, which made me nice again because I had gotten very hungry and very not nice, and cream in one's tummy makes one purr and take her claws out of the curtains.

Sunday, my first "Up" day, I went out to eat with my parents and brother and sister-in-law and kids, and I had FRIED CHICKEN WITH GRAVY ON IT. And then a side of MASHED POTATOES WITH GRAVY ON IT.

The only pool I swim in is the gravy pool.

Then that night, I ate ice cream. With chocolate and nuts. You know, just a snack.

In the book, Dr. Johnson claims that many people stop craving vats of gravy and ice cream as they progress on the diet. If this proves to be true, I will name my first grand baby, "Dr. James B. Michael Phelps Johnson" in honor of this miracle.

If you are seriously interested in this book, I'd like for you to have it. And as Dr. Johnson has paid it forward to me, so I shall unto you, if you leave a comment and I happen to draw your name in a couple of days. Just say in your comment, "Lid, gravy looks good on you. Now send me that book." Or something like that. If you want to comment but don't want the book, just say, "Lid, I don't need no stinkin' book, but I Ken Lee you." Or something like that.

And who knows, if you like the diet, we can share our "Ups" and "Downs!"

Hey! It's like I'm swimming across the page. Do you think this burns calories?

The Lone Wolf is Joining the Pack--Are You "Hungry Like The Wolf?"

What you say on your blog can come back to you, ladies.

This week, I received an email message from Diane of Meyers on the Hood:

I have now seen a couple comments spread around the BloggyWorld where you mentioned you might want to/should probably do the online Beth Moore "Believing God" Bible study. I want to/should probably do it, too. If you sign up, I'll sign up.

I said that?

Yep. More than once. But as far back as January, I posted about being the last lone wolf who had not joined a Beth Moore study. As a result, no one has ever called me a Siesta.

What someone called me, instead, relative to my lack of Beth Mooreness, is "Penultimate Coolness," which is the same as saying, "Almost Cool But Not Quite." In fact, here is my favorite comment after that post from none other than Missy of It's Almost Naptime:

You are way too cool to not have done a Beth study. Seriously. That is the ONLY thing holding you back from Ultimate Coolness. Right now, you are Penultimate Coolness.

I think she and Diane are right. It's time. And besides, "Siesta" is way easier to say than "The Penultimate Coolness."

Anyway, several of you commented after that post that I was not the last lone wolf, that some of you, too, had not participated yet.

If this is you, and you would like to join Diane and me in this online study, here's a little sumpin' we cooked up that might make your eyes narrow and the fur on the back of your neck stand up.

Every Thursday for the next nine weeks, Diane and I will take turns posting about that particular week's lesson. While we Diane and I totally Ken Lee each other, it would be awesome to hear from you about what you took away from that lesson and how God is moving in your life and circumstances.

You know, it would be like Diane and I are the wolves who howl first at the moon, and then you howl in response, and then we howl in return and so on, until the sun comes up or someone shoots us. Fun!

We are so excited about doing this that WE GOT A BUTTON.





You are welcome to copy our "Believing God" button and put it on your own blog so that others can join in on this journey of faith-building. Kind of like adding to the fold. But not the sheepfold, for heaven's sake, because then we'd have to eat them.

<a target="_blank" href="http://meyersonthehood.blogspot.com/2008/07/believing-god.html"><br/><br/><img border="0" width="150" alt="Believing GOD" src="http://i50.photobucket.com/albums/f337/rodmeyer/BelievingGodButton.png" height="142"/></a>

Sound fun? Sound like an adventure that God might want you to be a part of?
In that case, sign up and do your first week's lesson [watch a video, fill in some blanks] then meet us back here this Thursday, July 31.

We'll be here. Even if it's just the two of us. [Please don't let it be just the two of us.]

And now, this video doesn't have anything to do with Beth Moore or Diane or Missy, except that Missy is a child of the '80s, but here is Duran Duran with "Hungry Like the Wolf," which kept blaring in my head as I wrote this post. Maybe all Simon really needed was to join the Beth Moore online Bible study, "Believing God."




*Button designed by one of the most patient women in the world, Lindsay, of Splat Designs. Thanks!